Tuesday, July 21, 2009

33

Today, I'm 33.

My mom says I look 26.
I love my mom.
Secretly, I hope she's right.
But it really isn't important to me.

I expected to be on a solid path by now.
Instead, I'm less sure than ever
of what exactly it is
I'm supposed to be doing here.

I want to say I'm okay with that.
Secretly, I'm not.
Having clear goals is very important to me.

I feel too young to be where I am in life.
I feel too old to fit in with other people my age.
I feel just the right age to be what I am:
Different from anybody else I know.

That can make me feel lonely.
It can also make me feel like a superhero.
Daily, how I feel about that changes.

I went to lunch today at my favorite restaurant.
They know my name and what I'm allergic to.


I got a special birthday dessert, chosen just for me.
I had some fun company too.

Most of my day was just a regular day.
That doesn't bother me at all.

Dinner out was wonderful.
The eighteen million facebook greetings were heart-warming.
But the best part was a decadent bubble bath

with organic Mexican chocolate

by candle light
in my bathtub.
Followed quickly by a surprise bottle of sweet, girly, wonderful wine.

And now, I'll duck back out of the blogosphere for a bit longer. Thank you for all of the help with my pictures!
I'm almost better. I'm almost ready to keep moving. I'm almost ready to take on whatever is next.
Almost.
After all, I'm 33 now.
I should have this all figured out, right?
Ha!

8 comments:

claibornes corner said...

Happy Birthday sweet girl - You DO look like you are in your 20's!!! Your "late" card is on the way. We all love you very much and hurry back soon to your blog!

mindy said...

I know you've heard it from me several times in the past few days, but Happiest of Happy Birthdays, lovely Christy!! And I understand how it feels to be confused about where you are in life and where you're headed....but, trust me lady, you are exploring and pursuing sooo much of what you love. To me, you're an inspiration. :)

Mary said...

Happy Birthday yesterday. I didn't know of course. My friend Vanessa's birthday was yesterday too, so now I'll never forget.

Happy 33. It will be a wonderful year...I'm sure of that.

I think it's especially hard for us moms to figure out our goals because we have so many other people's goals to work toward as well.

Glad you're almost back.

Amy said...

I'm so glad you had a wonderful day. That restaurant looks fantastic, you'll have to let me know where it is. I'd like to know the good spots before we move.

I think that you'll figure it out and everything will be fine. I don't think we'll ever really have everything figured out. I wish my parents had taught me that :)

Jessica said...

I'm pretty sure I forgot to say it tonight. . . but happy birthday! I'm glad you had a lovely day. And thanks for having me over tonight :)

Christy said...

Thanks Jessica! And, it was my pleasure! *So* nice to meet you - and I can't wait to cut into that cute, cute, cute fabric!

lubke-moss said...

Happiest Birthday to you! (Just a little late.) Don't worry Christy. I've ALWAYS felt like I don't really fit in in any stage of my life, so there you go. You have company, at least. :)
Just keep enjoying the life the Lord has blessed you with - that's the most important thing.
A bubble bath with some decadent chocolate sounds like a pretty wonderful day to me!
P.S. I miss your blogging, too, though I understand a need for a hiatus.

Liz said...

Happy birthday Christi! And as a fellow 'havent got this thing figure out' woman, I can understand exactly what you're saying here.