The annual end-of-first-quarter parent/teacher conferences were today. I suppose lots of parents dread these things, but I have come to anticipate them with delight.
Emma's teacher was glowing with praise. She noted that she loves to see the stories Emma writes and that her drawings are so detailed. She is "one crazy girl" - but in the very nicest of ways. She received straight A's, of course, and is impressing one and all with her reading skills.
And Andrew, my Andrew....his teacher sat across the table from us and nearly made me cry. She praised his character and his academic skills, and boldly said that if she ever has a son, she only hopes he will be made of similar stuff. Sigh. Just what a mom likes to hear. His grades were also amazing - only one B - but what impressed me is what an outstanding, well-rounded guy he is. Of course, you know what they're like at home, but it doesn't always translate to the same thing when they're at school. So it's nice to know that he's confident and growing in so many areas.
Between his conference and the school pictures that came home today, I was really struck in the car on the way home by how much he's growing. Moms are never really prepared, I guess, for this stage. I know less and less about what goes on in his life and in his mind. I am starting to have to trust in his own ability to be who we have taught him to be. It's really scary.
When your kids are small, you really can't ever envision them being much more than what they are. And you know them through and through - you know their little bodies and you know what goes on in their heads, and you're connected to them in the everyday details of life. I can't believe how quietly that erodes.
Don't get me wrong - I'm super-proud. I love the people my kids are becoming and it's so exciting to begin seeing bits of who they will be in the long run.
There are just those times when it hits you between the eyes. The whole bittersweet thing. The slow pulling-apart that you never really see coming.
And, while it's tempting to be proud of myself for the people they are becoming, I know that I had little to do with it. Sure, I've molded and bent and shaped them a little bit, but the core of who they are came to me in a complete package at birth. I'm so honored to have been assigned to the care of these two people. It's like I always say - I was just standing in the right line when God was handing out kids.
DAILY BLISS: a good hair day, finding a pretty bracelet at the bottom of my jewelry drawer, and Wendy's chili
4 comments:
Not to argue with what you are saying, but you can't discount the fact that you chose someone to marry who had good character and between the two of you, you had a lot to offer the little souls you created. I'm just saying it's not all chance, and you have obviously done a great job of encouraging the good in each of them.
I hope I remember to look at this post when my boys are transitioning to manhood before my eyes. I try to keep this sort of thing in mind, especially when I'm praying for them each morning. We are not raising boys, we are raising men.
Yeah - I was thinking about you while I was writing that. I was wondering what I would think if I'd read it when my boy was 2 or 3....whether I would have been even able to comprehend the truth behind it. But, yeah - they are little men. And it's humbling.
And I don't take your comment as argument at all. I suppose I realize that Chris and I had something to do with it, but (and all moms, I'm sure can relate to this) more often than not, I don't measure up to the the mom I want to be. Not even close to the mothering idealism that was in my mind when my kids were small. And yet, even with all my failures and the disproving of many of my parental theories, they are amazing people. It's encouraging to let go of some of the responsibility, I guess.
They are incredible - and a whole lot of that is you and Chris! And the drawing and crazy girl (maybe a little nana!) PS I'm sending you the receipe for Wendy's chili - it's great!
So true Christy. So much to think about.
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